ihatesarahpalin.com: the great phone debacle of 08

Listening to this one has to wonder should I laugh or cry? What it really comes down to is this woman can't even be trusted to answer her own phone.......she's so special

ihatesarahpalin.com: sarah goes to the white house

I have a riddle for you.

Q: What could be worse that a forest fire started by a flaming squirrel?

A: Sarah Palin in the White House

Be sure to wait for the dinosaurs to pass the White House and open the door twice to see Katie Couric.

And I ran, I ran so far away.......

Every time an election goes "the wrong way" (or in this instance a primary) my mother threatens to leave the country. Usually she become so incensed at the thought of having to live under the rule of some despot that fleeing to a foreign land is preferable than suffering under a Republican's rule. But the dilemma always is, where to go.......which land to flee to.

My thoughts on the debate.......

I decided to take a break from Wii'ing to take a gander at the train wreak we call the VP "debate". First I am wondering if Sarah Palin's practicing for the debate involved sticking something in her ass, after they moved her own head aside to make room. She's looking a little stiff. As I am sitting here trying to make sense of the poo that is streaming from her mouth, I find myself left with some questions.

• Who the fuck is Joe Six Pack and why is he touching my hockey mom?

• What is up with the soccer moms now, they should ask her a question about title nine. It seems like it might be the only question she is qualified to answer.

• Who is Joe's dentist? His teeth look great. I bet he could crack nuts with them. I hope he cracks hers.
  

• Why is she reciting her resume.....can she please answer the fucking questions. I miss Tim Russett.
  

• Watching this makes me what to have beer with Joe and kick Sarah in the uterus on the way out the door

• At least she just admitted she has no experience and hasn't put any substantial issues on the table. Good for her. Honesty about ignorance is always the best policy.

• Did she bedazzle her own flag pin?

• Why does she make energy production sound pornographic.......I hope Joe drills her.

• Can someone give her some pom poms? She is like some kind of conservative pill head cheerleader.

• Did she really just say there are safe, stable ways to use nuclear weapons? Ohhh Matt Damon, how right you are to not want to give her the codes.
  

I find myself losing interest....good thing for DVR. I think I must return to Wii. I wish I could text Joe and tell him that Sarah is playing snake in the grass. She is pretending to be nice Joe....SHE HAS TEETH IN HER VAGINA JOE. He needs to break her and then tell the country he did it for us, to save us. Please save us Joe.

ihatesarahpalin.com: the great debates

Well tomorrow's the big day, and if her interviews with Katie Couric are any indication. It's gonna be a doozer. My co-worker is convinced that Sarah won't even make it to the big show. That some "emergency" will befall her. Maybe they will have Cheney shoot her in the foot accidentally so she can avoid the whole boondoogle. Either way, put on your Palin hair helmets and strap in for the ride....

The Palin and McCain Dong Show

Sarah Palin may not be have any foreign policy experience but she sure knows her geography.


Watch CBS Videos Online

I also think I figured out what is making its nest inside Sarah Palin's hair helmet.

Also, thank you Letterman for reminding us of what a complete idiot McCain is for acting like his is the one man calvary that is going to give the economy mouth to mouth resuscitation. And for pointing out, at least twenty three times in two minutes, that Sarah Palin's own campaign won't even put her in charge.

Do your duty. Watch the debates.

Ihatesarahpalin.com : The Weekly Round-up

• Alaska held its biggest political rally ever. With 1,400 people this massive show of force stretched for about 50 yards down the side of the road by the library. And they say public engagement in this country is dead. What prompted Alaskans to but down their moose pillows and venture out into the spotlight. A common hatred of Sarah Palin! Yay Alaska.

• Sarah Palin had her yahoo account hacked. What a dick.

• Even John McCain's Victory manager ex CEO Carly doesn't think Palin is "qualified" per se.
  

• Now Matt Damon is concerned. Thank you Matt for comparing the candidacy of Sarah Palin to a bad Disney movie and gently reminding us that perhaps giving her the nuclear codes is not the way forward.

And now for the fun stuff

• If you were one of Sarah's brainwashed offspring, what would she have named you?

• The are now Sarah Palin "action" figures. If by action you mean a vagina lined with teeth just waiting to eat Ken's head.
  

Thank you Laura, Matt, Joanna and Beth.........this stuffs the jam.